Calm is contagious

photo by Joanne Schwindt

Written on cue cards, posted on my kitchen wall, I have some of my favourite mantras to support me as I parent. Some of the most helpful are:

Calm is a superpower.

In stormy waters, be the way back to shore.

Their job to be children, my job to stay calm.

All of these, serve as an important reminder to regulate my own emotions and find calm.

Just like how I instinctively pulled my newborn babies, kissed their cheeks and rocked them when they cried, but SO MUCH HARDER when my almost 8 year old yell-cries that his origami frog isn’t working or my 5 year old is infuriated that he can’t get his helmet on just right.

But, coregulation really is magic. I have definitely failed on this many, many times. We all have. And guess what, my stress is (almost) as contagious as my calm and then the problem just gets bigger.

So, when I can stay calm, slow my breath, show my deep care for what they’re upset about, keep my voice slow and steady… I feel invincible. They calm just like they did when I used to rock them and we’re back on track.

Calm really is contagious.